The Nesting Doll

This week in classes we begin the 6 week map of the koshas. Koshas are our different sheaths that protect and conceal our true nature of pure consciousness and light. We are like little nesting dolls that when you open each layer of doll you get more and more subtle until you find a beautiful pearl in the center. We are that pearl. The pearl can never get dirty or lost because it is concealed by the subtle and gross layers of embodiment. However it can be forgotten. When our sheaths are out of balance, (which most are) they are so dim that we forget our true nature and what is of lasting importance in life. We have a case of mistaken identity being overtaken by fear, anger, depression etc. We forget that we are divine love, light, peace and balance. We forget our connection with ourselves, people and nature.

The analogy I like best to describe the koshas are lampshades. Our true nature is that of love and light and each subtle layer of embodiment covers that light like a lampshade... our mind, emotions, etc. These lampshades go from subtle to gross, the outmost lampshade being the physical body. This is the sheath we are exploring this week, the Annamaya Kosha. When a lampshade is dirty, dingy, and dusty it makes the light very dim. We can hardly see the bright light bulb underneath it all. Our work as yoginis is to clean each lampshade through our practice so our light shines through in all it's glory. When the physical body is inert, toxic, and diseased it is darkened and therefor the mind is darkened. When the mind is out of wack the emotions follow it's lead. When the physical body is strong, healthy, and vibrant from regular yoga practice, then our outermost lampshade is clean and clear so our light can shine a little brighter illuminating the heart and mind. How can we quiet the mind if the body has not already been addressed? It would be quite difficult. In yoga nothing lacks attention. Every layer of our being is given attention, cleaned and used to it's full potential. This week we discover the potential and capabilities of the physical body. We are practicing strong this week focusing on the Annamaya Kosha, bringing health and balance to the body and all of it's systems and functions.

I have a helper this week as well! Thanks to Doug, a little nesting doll is in the studio to give us a visual and help us understand the map of the koshas. We will see what the nesting doll will reveal next week....

"The word yoga signifies the means to realization of one's true nature" ~ Sri K. Pattabhi Jois

New Life

Did my water break or did I just pee myself?....

Two weeks early a being of light, Adrien Deva was ready to take birth again and grace our family with Divine new life. My water broke and we had not made any preparations for the birth. No supplies, no birth kit for the midwife, no clothes for the baby-nothing. Ken dashed to the store for supplies. I wasn't having contractions so I went to teach my class.

Having a home birth, I had high hopes of the labor and birth process. I had expected to meditate up until active labor when it got really intense. That didn't happen. I also expected to practice japa (mantra repetition with prayer beads) while in labor, but that didn't happen either. The force that took over during labor and birth was like no other. Every now and again I would mentally repeat a Ganesh and Durga mantra, but I realized afterward that I wasn't repeating mantras because I completely merged into that energy. I didn't need to call on any external energy/deity for strength and protection at the time because it automatically took over. During those 5 hours of labor I wasn't calling on Durga like I had anticipated, because at that time I WAS Durga.

I did not take any birth classes or preparation of any kind except for a regular yoga practice consisting of asana, pranayama, meditation and chanting. Just having a regular yoga practice made all the difference. I was so plugged in mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually that the energy could move through me and be expressed in just the right way to facilitate the birth of this being. I found out from my midwife afterward that each sound I made and each movement was intuitive. While many women have to be coached through labor, I was receptive, payed attention to my physical and pranic body and became a vehicle for divine birth. I have never experienced Kundalini Shakti quite like that before. Because of my yoga practice, the entire process was very graceful.

A regular yoga practice has an amazing effect on our day to day life. It has the power to turn moments of pain into opportunities to grow and change. Yogis may feel pain, but the attachment and reaction to it lesson. Yogis can experience pain as energy. Energy will never go away, but it can be changed.

After the intensity of birth the energy changed. I all of a sudden sensed the strong presence of Lakshmi, the energy of abundance. I had a new baby in my arms, milk flowing in abundance and I was surrounded by flowers and friends. The strong, protective warrior energy of Durga morphed into the soft, cool abundance of Lakshmi. I experienced the energy change within and around me. I am so blessed and so grateful!

This miracle of life I know
Has been placed in our hands....
Destiny we're fulfilling.
Look what jah jah gave me
New life,
a brand new little baby. -Midnite

The Great Muse

In classes during Navaratri (the nine nights of the Divine Mother) we explored and experienced the shakti of Kali, Lakshmi, and Sarasvati. The last three nights are dedicated to Sarasvati, the divine embodiment of learning, creativity, speech, music, art, writing, etc. How we apply all that we learn and live a life full of wisdom and creativity, and our own unique expression is the grace of Sarasvati.
Two weeks ago my husband, friends and I went out to the Spirit of the Suwanee Music Park for a long weekend of camping and live music everyday, all day and night. This is a festival that has been going on for over 14 years, Ken and I have been going for a decade. If you love music, you really must go. We camped on a cliff right on the beautiful, amber colored Suwanee river. Every night I went to sleep with the sound of the flowing river beneath me and every morning a melodious chorus of various birds woke me up to let me know it was time for chanting then yoga.
The imagery and shakti of Sarasvati began as the the actual Sarasvati river in India. In classes days before the festival we explored our own watery nature and the current of knowledge (Sarasvati) that flows from the mountain heights of meditation. As I now found myself camping on a Florida river I felt blessed to to be one with this river Goddess with all of her richness.
A main musical highlight of every one's weekend was Joe Craven. This man plays all instruments, and if there is not one around, he will pick up the nearest thing to him and play it! Literally... trash can, jaw bone, box, canjo (a banjo he has made out of a tomato can).... whatever. We attended a workshop of his where he took a girl from the audience who had never picked up an instrument in her life and he had her playing the fiddle while walking to her own beat. The focus of the workshop was to give everyone the encouragement to realize we all have an inner rhythm and anyone can play an instrument and sing and we need not be afraid to do this. That afternoon everyone came back with an instrument (whether we could technically play or not), and we jammed, and we realized you don't have to have formal lessons to feel music and play music.
The entire weekend I saw the magic of Sarasvati. The flowing river at the campsite, the extraordinary musicians that flooded the entire park, and that creative shakti that lies within all of us waiting to be expressed through whatever natural talent we have. This Goddess of the river of knowledge, speech and art forms is within all of us. If we ride the white swan of purity in mind and heart, we will experience an overflowing of these attributes that comes from the deep well of the spirit.

KALI: The Power of Yogic Transformation

How Kali is depicted in her manifest form as a Goddess is so widely misunderstood and often feared. Why are we in general so afraid of what seems foreign to us... what we do not understand? Many people see a fierce or frightening image, make their own assumptions, as wish to investigate no further. But for the one who has Sadhana (yogic practice), Kali is understood with a devotional heart and we are blessed to experience Kali's grace.
Kali is the High Priestess of Yoga. She is the power of all yogic transformations. She is shown as blue or black, with wild eyes and hair, carrying a severed head, a sword, wearing a garland of skulls. Kali takes us through the death of the old, and rebirth to the heights of spiritual awakening. She is kriya shakti or yogic action. The first spark or inclination we have to begin an inner yogic practice and she is the shakti that stays with us, leads us, and moves through us on our sacred quest in life. Perhaps this is why she looks so frightening to us, because she asks us to leave parts of the outer world for the inner world of meditation. To take a pilgrimage to our inner world, which is to have a true experience of our divine reality. Kali wants to take away the ego that only weighs us down but we cling to it so desperately. She wants to rid us of everything negative that holds us back from experiencing our true light of divinity. To the average person this does not seem so appealing and for some a very scary image...
The more we cling to old habits of negativity, the more cataclysmic Kali's energy can be. However, if we approach our sadhana with sincerity and bhakti (devotion), and hold to it with dedication, Kali nurtures us on our transformative journey just as a mother stays with her child as a guide and protector. Kali is the energy that moves us, that guides us into the heights of meditation. She is the yoga shakti that transforms our entire being until we come to know our true Self, which is to merge with Shiva (pure consciousness).

Happy Navaratri!

Today begins Navaratri: The nine nights of the Goddess. Yogis, Sadhaks, Shaktas and Tantrikas everywhere meditate on the Divine Mother at this time of transition into spring. From Durga springs forth her shaktis in which these first three days are dedicated to Kali, second three to Laksmi, and last three to Sarasvati. In classes this week and next, we will meditate on and experience the different energies and manifestations of Devi. This Saturday is the spring equinox which is half way through these nine nights. On this night we will gather together for Kirtan as our own sacred offering. At the end of each of the 3 day increments stay tuned for teachings from class and insights into the magical realm of Shakti that pervades the entire universe and beyond. Next...

Kali: The Goddess of Yogic Transformation

Yogic Alchemy

Alchemy is a process of transformation. Alchemists have the ability to turn heavy base metals into amazing metallic light, beautiful gold. The psychologist Carl Jung explained this alchemy as a metaphor for transforming our own internal darkness of the body and mind into light... "transforming the dark matter of the unconscious into the pure gold of the integrated self".
Through our yogic practices there is a graceful churning, an ongoing transformation into sattva (purity and light), an inner alchemy. As we hold to our practice with dedication grace flows through us purifying our minds and hearts and calls for us to let go and surrender to this grace even more. Only then can the Goddess Kundalini Shakti (spiritual energy) to be awakened within us and transform us safely and gracefully. When we come to understand and experience this transformative energy, grace unfolds in our lives and we see how shakti expresses itself through us. Tantrikas (tantric practitioners) like to say that Shakti breathes us. When we clear through the darkness of the mind and ego we see that we are not the ones even breathing here. As long as our organism is alive the breath is automatic.... Shakti is breathing us. All consciousness is a marvelous expressive dance of the Great Absolute.
With a dedicated yogic practice we are ever transformed, transcending all limitations so we can come into the glory of the integrated Self. To not just know this with the mind and intellect, but with love and attention, dedication and surrender, we get to experience this inner alchemy. As the Shakti moves through each of the koshas (sheaths of our being), and Chakras we experience how the darkness, dullness and inertia of the body, mind, and spirit are transformed into a golden vessel of capability and purpose.

TANTRA: A TAPESTRY OF LIGHT

There are many people who use the word Tantra loosely without knowing the true meaning or more importantly experiencing the true essence of Tantra. As "tantra" becomes more popular we see articles in magazines and books on the subject promising fulfillment in life. Many are drawn to this path finding it intriguing because of it's history of secrecy. ( which it has been for good reason) Many are drawn to this path like any other because of dark inner drives with the hopes of advancement in worldly pleasure and power. In reality Tantra is a very intimate relationship with the Divine Mother and all of her Shaktis. As the Divine Mother, this great force of the universe is both benevolent and fierce (as any good mother is). What ever you weave into your life the mother will let unfold. With pure motives and a devotional heart you will have the most amazing relationship with life, with motives driven by ego it will be to your demise as the mother's sharp edge slices through the ego severing head from body.

The Great Mother always provides. As I sat in a tent last friday night in the most amazing Kirtan with Bhagavan Das we sang to the Devi with utmost devotion. Streams of Bhakti poured from my heart, through my eyes, and flowed gently down my cheeks....in turn always to drop back onto my heart to purify myself more and more. We sang to Kali...take from me all the is not free. Once again the Great Mother always provides.

Tantra literally means to weave. We weave our own tapestry in life. We choose whether we weave darkness or light. Most of the time the average person is weaving darkness. Whether it is obvious or not, they are confined to living in the shadows of the senses and reactions of the mind. However, with a regular asana & pranayama practice we clear and purify the pranic body, weaving more healthy, free flowing energy into our lives. With a devotional heart we weave the light of love through our being and the end threads touch those around us. Through meditation the shadows of smoke of the mind begin to clear, revealing thoughts, motives, and reactions of the mind. We are then able to gravitate toward our highest potential. We drop out of thinking and doing, and drop in to feeling and experiencing. We experience that we are a beautiful tapestry of light. It's not that we no longer "do", just that we are no longer the "doer". We drop out so that grace can drop in.

I have a little Anusara Yoga in the background of my hatha yoga practice. Anusara yoga is very much alignment based, but John Friend's slogan for this system of yoga is "open to grace". We have to surrender or make a sacred offering of any preconceptions and rigidity in the mind and heart so Shakti can pour in. The Shakti takes over and we are graciously along for the ride. The intellect is illuminated and we weave the light of pure consciousness.

We all have our own unique threads of different colors and patterns. We have different methods and paths that we as individuals take as we create our own tapestry. It starts with our own beautiful threads of light, but as we weave together, we unify the tapestries of our lives. An incredible strength comes from collective energy. The result is the most resplendent tapestry of light and love.